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Why did they need to get rid of him?
Monday, October 24, 2005
  The strange case of the 7.30am burial and the tableau for the Yorkshire Post Written in Ralph Winstanley's style, but not by Ralph Winstanley

The strange Case of the 7.30am burial and the tableau for the Yorkshire Post

The widder laffed an danced az ah lay dyin
Shi clapped er ands cuz ah wuz nearly dead
Shi strolled araound the room an started cryin
Tu ivvery nurse oo came tu my death bed

Recoverin wi gin and bed an favours
Fer any man shi wanted in mi place
Shi changed er air fur 'giggly' an gave uz
A taste a wy shi wanted all mi space

Shid fon a way a strippin ivvery farthin
A long taime foor ah died ur wanted tu
Shid used the lads solicitin each shillin
An thed got rich as well - They ad tur do

Thed wukked across mi ead - an shid wukked wi um
Thed walked across mi sons an killed luv dead
Thed carried on wi strippin all mi income
An claimed tur represent mi in mi stead

An no wun in the Court nur in the plice force
No wun oo wuz competent nur braight
Wud tek um on fur fear thed lose thur cash source
(An thurz the Law - jus sinkin aout ur saight)

The widder an ur mates went off tur Scunthorpe
Away-day wi the Coroner an all
The undertaker organised in Scunthorpe
Proceedins tu proceed so shi dint fall

An then the dumped mi ere int dark ut mornin
A long taime foor the scrambled aout ur bed
Wit coffin-men - ne moor - tu stand theer mournin
Ant men oo dug mi grave tu soil me ead

But later on thur wur an odd procession
Furt Yorksha Post man - Acted laike a play
An floral tributes - an the widder gushin
An led by 'lovely' Gordon - keen an gay

Shi thinks shiz ad ur uppance an its ovver
Shi thinks shiz killed mi off - an thinks shiz won
Shi thinks uz cash - an gettin rid ut luvver
Iz ovver- but its onny jus begun

Charlotte Peters Rock (Daughter of the Dumped)

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